Story of the Week

Feb 24, 2012

The first story this week comes from the skies over Portland. Muslims Screaming “Allah is great” Arrested After Causing Disturbance on Continental Flight to Houston. Two middle eastern men apparently got angry with a flight attendant when they could not sit next to each other. Rather than just accepting it and buying something from the Sky Mall, the two Muslim men started screaming, “Allah is Great!” Needless to say this frightened all of the other passengers. When one of the Muslim men violated the smoking ban, the flight attendant asked for help. Several male passengers came to her aid and physically subdued the two men. The plane returned to Portland and the police took the idiots away in handcuffs. Hopefully, their VISAs will be revoked and they can go back to whatever horrible place teaches their citizens such poor manners!

Our Second Place Story proves that Rednecks are not confined to the Southern United States: Man Dies in ‘Couch Surfing’ Road Accident in Canada. If you are not familiar with couch surfing, it is a pretty simple form of recreation. You just tie or chain a couch to your friend’s pickup truck, lay down on the couch, and let your friend pull you down the highway. Alex, from Quebec, was pulling Francois on a couch. It was just good, clean fun until Alex lost control and the couch ended up in the oncoming lane. Francois was struck and killed by another vehicle and Alex faces charges. “Hey y’all, watch this!”

First Place this week comes from my home state of Georgia: Suspect Claims Demon Visited Him Before Killing. Hemy, pictured at the left, may look normal. Most people do when they come to trial. A haircut, a new suit, no cocaine for a few weeks, and they look respectable. Hemy is on trial for the murder of the husband of the woman he was supposedly having an affair with. Passion killings are nothing new. Hemy, however, said that a demon and an angel visited him before he shot and killed the victim. Even more interesting than that is the fact that the demon sounded like Barry White and the angel looked like Olivia Newton-John. He should have listened to Olivia…

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